Brandon Twp-Pat and Ernie Bedford are by their own admission totally different people.
He is extremely organized and a stickler for detail, she is not. He is a runner, she’s not even a walker. She is a Michigan State fan, he likes the University of Michigan.
But when Cupid flung his arrow, it found its mark and stuck’that was 50 years ago.
Ernie was working for a dry cleaning service when he first saw Pat who worked for Michigan Bell Telephone Company. He delivered dry cleaning to her home and wanted a date but was intimidated by her father, an assistant Pontiac fire chief. Overcoming his fear Ernie asked her to go to a Detroit Tigers baseball game.
Six months later they were engaged and with Pat wanting a date as close to Valentine’s Day as possible, they married two months later on Feb. 11, 1955.
‘A short engagement is good, because it gives you less time to find defects,? said Ernie smiling. ‘Defects show up just like warts.?
The Bedfords were the first couple to wed at Lakeland Presbyterian Church in Waterford. Pat says it was beautiful, a small affair with mostly family and friends present.
‘I wasn’t interested in guests,? Ernie said.
The reception was at her sister’s home and they spent their wedding night at the Algonquin Hotel in Port Huron. A Marine Corps convention was there at the same time but Ernie, a former Marine swears he didn’t know that.
They honeymooned in Toronto.
‘The hotel made the best apple pie with cheese in the crust,? said Ernie, responding to what they remember best about their honeymoon.
The Bedfords? first residence was a little house they rented, located in Waterford in the middle of a nursery similar to Bordine’s.
‘It was heaven,? Pat recalled.
They purchased a brand-new home in late 1955. Ernie remembers that first year as ‘beautiful,? until they lost their first child to a miscarriage in early 1956.
The miscarriage was followed, however, by the births of five healthy children? Edythe in November 1956, D. Ernie Jr. in November 1957, Robin in March 1959, Russell in May 1960, and Patrick in November 1961. Pat quit work when Edythe was born and wouldn’t return to Michigan Bell Telephone until their youngest child was in kindergarten.
Ernie, working for the Pontiac Fire Department and regularly taking college classes, shared in all the parenting duties, doing whatever needed to be done, including house cleaning and diaper changes. He said he did discipline too.
Pat laughs.
‘Sometimes you wonder if you lived in the same house with how perfect they were,? she said.
But the Bedfords agree they rarely differed on how to raise their children.
The early years were lean, with Ernie making $4,800 his first year at the fire department. Pat recalled that eating out meant McDonald’s on payday.
‘When you’re first married and have five kids you don’t have everything that everyone else has, but you don’t expect to,? she said. ‘When our kids were growing up it wasn’t like today with computers and video games. They played outside and did other stuff.?
After five years in the new home, they moved to Arizona, where Ernie worked for another fire department. They spent three years there, but missed family and returned to Waterford. Ernie continued attending school and working, eventually becoming a risk manager for the City of Pontiac.
By their own account, the Bedfords were involved parents, never missing a parent-teacher conference and were active in their children’s sports and other activities.
‘I don’t remember any difficult times when the kids were home,? Ernie said. ‘We were too busy.?
Life slowed down some when their kids left the nest. Ernie speaks proudly of them, listing their many accomplishments and talking about their grandchildren as Pat nods.
‘The kids get the good stuff from me,? she says.
In 1980 Ernie retired from the City of Pontiac, but took a full-time job at Citizen’s Insurance. He retired from there in 1994, the same year Pat retired from Michigan Bell Telephone.
The Bedfords say that in some ways, 24-hour togetherness is tougher on their marriage. But Ernie says he loves Pat more today than he did 50 years ago.
‘I know her better. She gave birth to my children and we raised them together and she puts up with me,? Ernie said.
Some of the things Ernie says Pat ‘put up with? include Ernie’s heart attack and three strokes.
‘I don’t look at it that way,? Pat said. ‘We do what we have to do.?
Four years ago the Bedfords bought a home in Brandon Township. They share many common interests and play cards, travel, attend church and bowl together, having fun’most of the time.
‘I resent that she beat me three straight games at bowling yesterday,? Ernie says.
Even though Pat is not a runner, Ernie said she attends all of his 10k runs, although he says she’s probably just checking to see if he’s still alive.
The Bedfords say their brothers and sisters have all had long marriages too.
‘Once you’re in our family you’re stuck,? Pat jokes.
But in seriousness, the Bedfords attribute their successful marriage to compatibility, compromise, and making adjustments as necessary.
‘You have to work at it,? Pat said. ‘You have to accept the other person as they are and have give and take. I think the divorce rate is so high because no one is willing to put up with anything. People don’t go into marriage with the right attitude in a lot of cases. They think, ‘if it doesn’t work out, it doesn’t work out.??
Marriage is definitely working for the Bedfords.
‘The best part of marriage is knowing someone’s there, someone you can share things with? good or bad,? Pat said.
Ernie agreed and says he’d like to renew their vows.
‘I’d do it again,? Pat smiled.