Oxford’s answer to Ms. Manners

Did you know it’s not proper etiquette to ask ‘who’s calling? when answering the phone?
Or do you know how to properly eat your soup?
Oxford resident Pamela Barc knows, and she’s making it her goal to teach the young and old the basics of etiquette.
While owning a preschool in Auburn Hills, Barc received positive feedback from parents on the way she taught proper etiquette to their 3 and 4-year-olds.
‘A little bird sat on my shoulder for seven years saying ‘I’ve got to do this on a bigger scale,?? she said.
After countless hours of researching the history of etiquette, talking to teachers and even speaking with etiquette guru Maria Everding of the Etiquette Institute in Missouri, Barc decided it was time to start her own business, called Etiquettes Edge, last fall.
Her main mission with the business is to help kids realize ‘they’re OK the way they are.?
‘There’s too many messages that say we have to change,? Barc said. ‘But, society has guidelines and we need to learn how to tweak ourselves to prevent embarrassment and be able to adapt to whatever the social setting is.?
Starting at the ripe age of four through elementary school, children can participate in the four-week-long ‘Kidequette? program which focuses on issues of respecting elders, correct posture, etiquette in public places and’of course’keeping their elbows off the table.
‘We’ve tried to make (the programs) humorous because kids learn when they’re having fun,? Barc explained.
For those in middle school, the ‘Uniquely U? program teaches how to properly answer the phone, mastering table setting, tone and attitude of voice and how to begin taking care of physical features.
‘It’s really about bringing them to a little bit more sophisticated style of living because life will treat them accordingly,? said Barc.
For high school students, Barc’s ‘Diversity University? program not only covers basic manners and how to set dinner tables, but also tackles e-mail and cell phone etiquette and even how to create a good resume for their college years.
‘This program separates the mediocre (from) those who get noticed,? she said.
Barc said the common thread that these programs fix is that we as a people have ‘lost sight of guidelines of etiquette and manners that will only helpus get along better with each other.?
‘Then you’ve got the multi-cultural element of a global society that is now part of our world,? she said. ‘We have to learn even more and be even more sensitive.?
Etiquettes Edge’s program ‘Executive Essentials? will teach the basics of business etiquette, like how to tackle some taboos of international travel. For instance, what to talk or not talk about in countries like Japan or China.
Barc has even created business presentations on customer service for people like the Lake Orion Chamber of Commerce and the ReGina Paul Salon in Oxford.
‘It’s not all about a fork, a knife and a spoon,? Barc said. ‘My job is to help people realize this encompasses everything.?
Although some parents might argue their child learns manners at home and doesn’t need a program like Etiquettes Edge, Barc believes the extinction of the ‘dinner hour? proves differently.
‘One of my first questions would be to ask yourself how many times a week do you and your family sit down for an hour dinner together,? she asked. ‘If the dinner table is no longer a focus, tell me where a child’s going to learn how to use the right utensil or where their napkin goes??
She also believes children and teenagers overuse of ‘slang? and lack of respect towards authority figures contributes to the way society is today.
‘If you don’t require enough respect from your child, then they’re not going to require it from anybody else,? Barc said.
While Barc is highly experienced in the world of etiquette, she admits she’s constantly learning more and more about her trade.
‘I want to be (known as) the first etiquette lady of Michigan,? she laughed. ‘To be my own best role model.?
Children from Rochester Hills, Waterford and Lake Orion got a jump start on their etiquette last Saturday after attending Barc’s ‘Polite is Right? program at the Poppyseed Deli in Lake Orion. Another one is planned for March 18 from 9:30 a.m.-11 a.m.
Etiquettes Edge will be holding its week-long Camp Etiquettes through the months of June, July and August at Civic Park in Lake Orion and Bloomer Park in Rochester Hills.
The cost is $185 and registration is required.
Etiquettes Edge is also looking for individuals with experience in mutli-cultural backgrounds to help out.
Call Pamela Barc at (248) 894-5914 or e-mail her at etiquettesedge@yahoo.com for more information and camp dates.
Etiquettes Edge will be holding its week-long Camp Etiquettes through the months of June, July and August at Civic Park in Lake Orion and Bloomer Park in Rochester Hills. The cost is $185 and registration is required.
Etiquettes Edge is also looking for individuals with experience in mutli-cultural backgrounds to help out.
Call Pamela Barc at (248) 894-5914 or e-mail her at etiquettesedge@yahoo.com for more information and camp dates.

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