Stupid coronavirus.

By Don Rush

Yup. It’s true. I sometimes get lost. It’s not that I don’t have a decent sense of direction, it’s just sometimes I enjoy the journey and forget to pay attention. It’s the same thing nowadays as it was when I was just a wee, little man.
Back in the days before there was a Heather Lakes Estates straddling Orion and Independence townships, there were corn fields. I don’t think it was maze or mazola, I think they were just fields of feed corn for the pig farm on Clarkston Road — the ever-lovin’ and often smelly Z Farm. Any way, we used to play hide and seek in there . . . and more times than not I was such a savvy hider, I was never found. I would always get lost. The corn was taller than me, and after running and turning and zigging and zagging, I would have no idea which way to go. So, I would just walk straight until I hit a road.
Same thing today, I still forget to keep track of where I am going, so I just keep going. Today’s fun and adventure doesn’t happen in the corn fields, however, rather usually on the old interwebs.
The other day, I went down the rabbit whole of death numbers supplied by the State of Michigan in regards to the coranavirus, better known as COVID-19. I have no idea how I got to that website ( but I was intrigued. And, I am here to testify to all of you, the Coronavirus is an ageist, sexist, body shaming virus. I have no empathy for it, and it needs to be cancelled.
So, looking at the number of deaths the state provided (which at the time was a tad shy of 7,000), I discovered the following number of deaths by age group.
People 80 and over, 3,000 deaths
People 70-79, 1,873 deaths
People 60-69, 1,223 deaths
People 50-59, 556 deaths
People 40-49, 225 deaths
Folks 30-39, 67 deaths
Folks 20-29, 26 deaths.
What an ageist virus.
* * *
For the last 28 weeks, I have been keeping track of the number of COVID cases there are in The Oxford Leader’s primary area of circulation and editorial coverage. I started reporting about this on April 15 by going to Oakland County’s website to find the numbers. In this area (three ZIPs, 48367, 48370 and 48371), the population is nearly 31,000. On the first week, I reported the area had a total of 47 cases and one death. Fast forward 28 weeks to this week, and the numbers have increased to 239 total cases and six deaths.
Do you know that in all of the 16,377 square miles of Michigan’s Upper Peninsula there have been only 62 confirmed COVID-19 deaths. Of the UP’s 15 counties, seven had zero deaths. In the 2010 Census, the UP’s population was 311,361.
I guess the virus likes Yoopers more than it does Fudgies or Trolls.
* * *
I found this timeline of Coronavirus death of interest, too. On April 1, there were 637 COVID-19 confirmed deaths in Michigan. On May 1, there were 4,342.
On June 1, there were 5,666 coronavirus deaths. On July 1, 6,016. On August 1, there were 6,243 deaths. On September 1, there were 6,536 deaths. On October 1, there were 6,808 COVID-19 deaths.
* * *
I think this virus is a little sexist, too. When I was tooling down the old information highway I discovered COVID-19 has killed 3,634 men, compared to only 3,338 women.
* * *
In Michigan, here are the number of deaths by race.
American Indian: 24
Asian/Pacific Islander: 90
Black: 2,582
Multi-race: 104
Other (and I am not sure what “other” means): 150
Unknown: 171
White: 3,852
* * *
And, if this virus isn’t bad enough, why does it have to pile on and increase the risk of death to us “large boned” folks. It ain’t fair.
Stupid corornavirus.
* * *
Before I get too far down the biway . . . we received a handwritten note the other day from a Lake Orion Review reader.
“To Whom It may Concern: I appreciate your paper; however, I DO NOT appreciate Don Rush referring to our governor as “Big Gretch.” That is unprofessional and unnecessary. Thank you.”
Thanks for reading, I say, adding she’s been called worse.
* * *
I did receive an email from an anonymous person, in regards to last week’s stroll into the hallowed halls of Don’t Rushmedom. Last week, I wrote about laying flat on my back because of a flare up of my sciatic nerve.
“Good morning, I just read your October 14 column. First, I’m glad you are all right and second, you are funny. Your columns make my day!”
Thanks for reading, whoever you are. Your text made my day!
Send your comments and or concerns to Don’s email,

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